So stand up is out.  For now anyway.  It looks like Mr. Sheen may have to switch careers soon and I just wanted to throw a few suggestions I had as to possible follow ups to his comedic career.

1. Go Pro

Wrestling that is.  Lots of former actors have done stints on WWE playing themselves and jumping into the ring. Like David Arquette, Micky Rourke, even Hulk Hogan.  What do you say champ?

2. Get a Real Job 

Sure the economy is in the tank. But Warlocks aren’t affected by recessions (or drug laws?).  Which is why Sheen should get off the couch, take a few Franco-level classes at Yale and go corporate.

3. Find Jesus

It worked for Danny Baldwin.  

4. Try Acting

Many comedians go dramatic after they get stale.  It’s like when NFL players retire and become announcers.  They’re hard to watch, often out matched by their counterparts, and the whole time the only thing you can think of while watching is “Man they did NOT age well.”

5.  Start a Rock Band

If you’re a bitchin rock star from Mars, then prove it Mr. Sheen.  Let’s hear you shred.  My pitch for your band name…

(full disclaimer - I’m all for more professional looking photoshop but I’m also all more for apathy)